36 and Counting

Wow!  I have been married for 36 years.  And it's true - some days it feels like yesterday and some days it feels like forever.  Tho I mean that in a great way.  We've been together so long, it's hard to remember being single.  But as some of you know, the older you get, the faster it seems that time passes.  It's hard to believe it's been thirty six years!

Actually, our 25th anniversary celebration was more fun than the wedding.  We did another ceremony, wrote our own vows, and all our kids participated.

This is what I wrote:

As a little girl, I began dreaming of the perfect man that God would have for me. As I began dreaming and waiting, I fell in love with that man, long before I ever met him.
God knew I needed 
a man who would love me unconditionally;
a man to protect me from the world and sometimes from myself;
a man to be my personal counselor as I dealt with what seemed like overwhelming obstacles in life;
a man to share my dreams with;
a man to dream new dreams together with;
a man who would be my biggest encourager;
a man to be the best daddy in the world to our girls;
a man who would be kind to to others;
a man who would put God first, even before me;
a man who would be MY Promise Keeper.

In His infinite wisdom, God wrapped all that, and more, and gave me the man of my dreams to share my life with.


For our anniversary this year, Mark took off at noon.  We went to see '42' - great movie - and then out to eat.  We begin to play one of our new games - 'What's your favorite____'   This time we listed favorite things we've done.  At first, it was things we'd done alone, just the two of us.  But that's a fairly short list, so we started reminiscing about things we'd done with the girls and family.  Weddings, anniversary and births were a given. 

A trip to Destin Florida with all our kids (pre little girls), my siblings, their families and my mom was at the top of our list.  It's always so much fun to have extended time with family.    When Tara was a Freshman in college and Rachael a Senior in high school, we went to Disney World. They enjoyed the trip even though they were older.  Funny, both those trips were earned through my job!  Those of you that know me well, know that I LOVE San Francisco.   So naturally our first, enchanting trip to San Fran was on the list, as well as subsequent ones!

Conversation then became precious memories of the past years, which included so many people.  Can't list them here, for fear of leaving someone out.  God has shared so many dear people with us.  And you are each loved and treasured!

One of the more recent highlights of our life was Mark's new job in 2011.  After 34 years of traveling enough miles each year to drive around the world, Mark is now off the road!  We have a real life now.  We can do things any night of the week.  We were so tired of being separated so much.  And all those miles - Mark was done with it!  Again, we are so blessed!

But I'm using this blog to honestly share some of the things that go through my head.  Even ones that are not so pretty.  And what was passing through my head earlier was on the selfish side.

Naturally, I was thinking about the anniversary for days before it arrived.  Wondering what Mark was going to do for me.  Would he plan a fabulous evening?  Would it include a great food and spectacular meal?  Suddenly I was struck with how selfish was I!  It is our anniversary, not my anniversary.  I got online and spent quite a bit of time looking for something I could do for Mark.  Though I never did find anything that seemed just right.

That evening I confessed to Mark how selfish I'd been that day and that I'd searched for quite a while looking for something I could do for him.  We discussed some options and the budget and together planned our day out.

But why are women so quick to look for what is being done for us?  I would submit to you that culture has spent a lot of money - music, movies, advertisements - suggesting we want more, we want to be pampered, we want to be spoiled!  Clearly not a mindset you would find in the Bible.  Which is where I claim to find the foundation of my life!  

Acts 20:35b It is more blessed to give than receive.

John 13:34   A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.

I Cor. 13:4  Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant.

Phillippians 2:4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Romans 12:10 Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.

Phillippains 2:3 b   in humility count others more significant than yourselves.

Our celebration was special, we are grateful for our time together.  But my focus in the coming weeks and months is going to be looking for more ways to bless Mark.   My beloved Marky.