Life Coach

So I've gone and done it - I hired a Life Coach!  I have a couple of dear friends that are or have been coaches in specific areas and I'm sure they'd be surprised that I have a coach.

Life coach means we've talked about topics in 'the circle of life' - spirituality, creativity, finances, career, education, health, physical activity, home cooking, home environment, relationships, social life and joy.   So I've told her all sorts of stories of my life.  Such as the childhood traumatic explanation of why I don't know how to swim.  And why I say my rhythm stops at my fingers and I'm paralyzed at the thought of getting on the dance floor.

I have pleasant stories about my family.  I'm extremely satisfied with my home environment.  I scored myself highest on joy.  I mean really.  I'm with my Marky, he's not on the road all the time like he was for over 30 years.  We have 5 fabulous grandchildren that we love spending time with.  I love living in a city!  I enjoy my baby grand piano - who would have ever thought I'd have one!  And I'm here, breathing.  Yes, there are difficulties in life.  But true joy is my deepest emotion.

Mostly, I hired her to help me rework how I eat.  I was trying on my own to figure out what is the best way to eat healthy.  There are so many options and opinions, it is nigh on to impossible to figure it out!

I had tried the all raw path.  I bought the spiralizer, but raw strings of veggies are not the same as spaghetti!  Just saying.  On my own, I was able to pretty much eliminate most sugar.  Cutting out wheat was another story!  I was trying to figure out Paleo, but there were so many variations, I felt like I was walking a maze blind folded.

I'm finally getting the hang of it.  I'm learning how to sweeten food without sugar.  Who knew there was coconut sugar and it was just as tasty as brown sugar, yet better for you.  Giving up all wheat was a bit harder.  I sent her a text as I was walking past the bakery at Costco, "The aroma of fresh bread is seductive!"  But I managed to keep walking and not put any bread, cookies, cakes or such in my basket.

Yesterday I made a 'BBQ' pork tenderloin without brown sugar, but it was SO tasty!  I exchanged  unhealthy ingredients for better choices in my stir fry and Mark liked it better the new way.  As we were enjoying the reworked beef stroganoff, I commented that it would be good as a company meal.  Mark thought it qualified as a restaurant meal!  Score!

But I do have my limits and my coach finds them entertaining!  She kept telling me yesterday I need to write about them in my blog.

Peas.  They are a no no.  One of the first things that Mark and I agreed on - no peas.  I don't like the taste or texture and I literally gag on them.

Cooked cabbage.  Who decided that was tasty food?  How could that be because it smells horrible when it's cooking!

She did agree with me on liver.  Why would you eat that?  There is no way to make it tasty.  None!

And then there is wings.  I'm like, really? If given the choose of any piece of fried chicken (I know, fried chicken is a no no), who would choose the wing? Not any man I know!  But offer them BBQ wings and they'll fight you for the last one.  All they really want is the sauce and mess.  There's not that much meat on a chicken wing.

So I was telling her about a fabulous recipe for 'Better than Fried Chicken" that was saucy wings.  Instructions were to take them out of the crock pot, put on the sauce and bake it to make the skin crispy.  Her response was that the skin was really good for you.  I'm like, really?  Think about it - how disgusting is that, eating skin.  Or the giblets.  I throw those out.  Makes my mother cringe to think I've wasted them.

I've added a lot more green to my diet.  I buy baby spinach and kale in large containers now.  And I eat it all.  I will say the strings on the spinach gags me, so I cut it before I put it in the salad.  I'm eating salad almost always for lunch and again at dinner.  So I'm not doing it at breakfast.  I've tried the smoothies at breakfast with loads of greens, berries for sweetness and other stuff.  I don't find it satisfying.  I want real food.  Not drinking my breakfast!  Drinking dessert?  Now that's another topic!

Yesterday she started telling me all the horrible, unhealthy ingredients that are in candy.  Okay, not tempted to consume massive amounts of Halloween candy now.  Truth be told, I really do feel so much better.  Hard to explain the difference, but clearly I feel good.

Now we're focusing on movement - specifically walking.  I'm committed to walking.  Every day.  Yesterday I put on a pedometer, but I'm not sharing what my total steps were yesterday.  It was a shamefully small number.   The focus is on gradually increasing that number.  Eventually, maybe, I'll share my daily steps.  Don't hold your breath waiting, though!

But I'm finally not just talking the talk, but also walking the walk.  Pun intended.  For years, when explaining the benefits of my Jordan products, I've been telling people that what you put on your skin is just as important as what you eat and drink. Which is very true.  Now I'm much more careful about knowing what I eat and focusing on making better choices.

Concentrating on being healthy takes a lot of work.   But as my mother used to tell me, if something is important, the effort is worth it.  And to quote myself from my parties, "It's your future.  Are you going to get there and will you be healthy when you do?"  I intend to get there.  I have 5 weddings to go to - eventually.  And I'm going to be healthy and feel good when I do!

October - Breast Cancer

Okay, so it’s October.  I guess I should write about breast cancer.  Must say though, it’s really not my favorite subject.  Clearly, I know more about it than I’d like to. 

Actually, I don’t feel as though I suffered that much with it, I really don’t have a lot to complain or whine about.  I had a lumpectomy instead of a mastectomy, so no need for reconstructive surgery and recovery.  I did a month of daily radiation.  I only did 4 chemo treatments.

The initial shock, scare and fear were very real, that’s for sure.  We did all the above, except for the chemo, in the process of moving.  So there wasn’t much time to think about it.   I had too much packing to do!

During the chemo treatments, several people suggested I go to a support group.  I looked into it and actually called and chatted with a lady that led a Christian group.  I never went.  I was trying, tho not always successfully, to be upbeat and have a positive attitude. As I thought about attending a group, I decided I didn’t want to sit around and talk about the cancer.   Besides, I’ve been married to my therapist for years!  He’d gotten me through dealing with childhood baggage, finding my self esteem, my parent’s divorce and other issues in life.  We got this.

It just wasn’t a topic I wanted to talk about it.  I wanted to get on with my life and focus on other things.  I have a wedding to go to!  That’s the title of my book I’ve written, and actually, now I have 5 weddings to go to – eventually.

We bought everything there was that was pink the first couple of years.  Especially in October.  Every store had items with pink handles and such.  I did do the Relay for Life one year. 

I’ve tried to offer comfort and encouragement to others dealing with breast cancer.  I’ve been known to speak to strangers and reassure them that the hair does grow back.

This year I went to an luncheon put on by a breast cancer survivor to remember those that lost their battle, encourage those in the middle of the battle and celebrate those done with the process.  I could have participated in the ‘walk’ they did, but I don’t like doing something when I don’t know what is going to happen.  So I sat at the table with a few friends from my networking group and the walk starts.  Those that have had breast cancer are introduced, they tell how many years since their diagnosis and then they walked out to music and through a line of cheerleaders waving their pom poms. 

I was pretty calm with the first few.  Then I started getting really emotional.  Some were new to the journey, wearing scarfs or hats or were comfortable with their bald heads.  Some were over 20 years out.  Those made me cry.  What scared me the most when talking with the doctor was they would only talk about the next 5 years.  I needed to hear that there were women who had survived many years after the breast cancer.

Some were very young.  Those made me cry too.  One of our daughter’s very young friends had recently passed after 2 bouts of breast cancer in about 2 years. 

Some had 2 dates – they had been diagnosed twice!  Gotta tell ya, that is one thing all cancer patients are afraid of.  You do the surgery, radiation, chemo, prevention meds with horrible side effects and then . . . it comes back!

I went to this event to show support for this dealing with breast cancer.  Though I didn’t expect to be so deeply moved.

February 2006 was when I got the news I had breast cancer.  By the second week in November 2006 I had finished my last chemo treatment.  So I’ve been cancer free for 8 years.  So grateful to be past the 5 year mark.

Sometimes I need to be reminded of what I’ve been through to help me remember how well my family and friends took care of me.   I need to be reminded how much my God has blessed me through this and how my faith helped me through the difficult days.  I need to be reminded I GET to be 60 and to live my life aware and grateful for my blessings.